Two Seconds In And Your Head Explodes!

THE AWESOME MOVIE OF AWESOMENESS
By Sara and Julie

The movie starts out with Robert Downey Jr. dead! in a coma. Then we flash back to a normal Robert Downey Jr. and his two best friends: Johnny Depp and Jeff Goldblum. Johnny Depp's got a sister though, Helena Broham Carter. And Jeff Goldblum can speak five languages and half-way through the movie he inherits a bar.

Meanwhile, we see Edward Norton selling some drugs. For he is a new drug dealer in town. This two flunkies are Jensen Ackles (he can act the shit out of things) and Misha Collins (he doesn't blink!). Now what is interesting with the two is that when alone they have 'who can talk in a growlier voice' contests, but as soon as Edward Norton walks in the room, they both speak in their normal voices. They sell drugs to many people, but the one we're concerned with his Helena Broham Carter.

But while all that is going on, Christopher Walken is running the Mob (complete with Mob/Gangster suits). James Spader is Christopher Walken's right hand man and Eliza Dushku is the muscle. She had done a short stint in prison (or 'The Big House') for assault and when she got out she had to go to an anger management class which is in the same building as the AA Mettings that Helena Broham Carter goes two. The two met and are now best friends and do each other's nails (also, this lot are the main Villains and they do Villainous things).

Now, Edward Norton, Jensen Ackles, and Misha Collins are moving in on Christopher Walken, James Spader, and Eliza Dushku's turff. And that kinda ticks off Mobsters. So they try to get rid of the Drug Dealers.

Previously mentioned, Jeff Goldblum inherits a bar halfway through the film. The Mobsters are running a protection ring and demand money that the three don't have. Villainous things ensue.

There is also an intermission where Andy Wilson from the band Steppin' In It plays his harmonica (for he is made of awesome, as are all the actors).
And Eddie Izzard has a cameo, as does Jared Padalecki in that he sees Jensen Ackles and Misha Collins talking all growly and sees them throw trash on the ground, Jared Padalecki tells them to pick it up and Misha Collins doesn't blink at him while Jensen Ackles tells him to pick it up himself (which he does - and that is all of Jared Padalecki's scene).

The movie bounces around from one scene to another, jumping all over the place. At the end we find out that Robert Downey Jr. wasn't dead in the beginning like we thought, but in a coma. I also suspect that he gets out of the coma, and that he was put into the coma either by drugs from Edward Norton, Jensen Ackles, and Misha Collins or was beat up by Eliza Dushku.

Also the movie is eight hours long.

Until Next Time